I went into a shoe store with the sole intention (pun intended!) of finding black, flat, patent-leather shoes. The young lady working in the store asked if she could help me, and I asked for black, flat, patent-leather shoes. She said, "You are out of luck, we don't have any", and then wandered away.
I was somewhat disappointed, but I thought, "what the heck, I AM IN A SHOE STORE! We don't even have a shoe store in Perth! Woo-whoo!"
I wandered down the first aisle, and there was a pair of black, flat, patent-leather shoes. And then another. And another. And another, with a little splash of leopard print. So I pick up the snazzy black, flat, patent-leather shoes with the leopard print (40% off, no less!) and go to the cash register. And wait. And wait. And wait.
I begin fantasizing about walking out with the shoes to see if young lady even notices. I don't think she COULD notice, since she was no-where to be seen. I figured that surely before the police arrest me, I could make them look at the surveillance video that shoes I TRIED to pay! Then I imagined walking around to the cash register and madly pressing keys until an alarm went off or the cash draw popped open. I am not sure what I would do if it did pop open, but hey, this is a fantasy!
So, I ended up walking out. No shoes for me! *NOT* a shopping happy ending!
Now let's take a look at what shopping is like in Perth-Andover.
A few months ago, I went in to Patti's Gift Shop. It was a hot summer day, but I spied some tights that were only $5, regular price! A few days later, I realize maybe I should get a few more pairs of tights. I get on Facebook, write a note to Patti, but alas, there are no more tights! About a month later, a note comes into my Facebook account saying a new batch of tights are in. SERIOUSLY? I couldn't beg the shoe girl to take my money, and Patti remembers a month later I really wanted some tights. A P-A shopping happy ending!
This summer, Greg and I decide to go to Quebec to get some cheap beer. That's not illegal is it? If it is, can you please NOT tell the cops on me? (Thanks). Before heading down the highway, we stop by Kendall Nissen's store for a sub. He has great spices, nuts, organic food, and amazing cheeses. Anyway, Greg says, "Hey, you want some beer from Quebec"? Kendall says "Sure". Three hours later, we drop off some beer to Kendall, get the money.... Reselling beer isn't illegal is it? If it is, can you please NOT tell the cops on me? (Thanks). The best part is, as a thanks, he gave us some wonderful cheeses, smoked salmon and crackers. It's easy to be loyal to a shopkeeper like that. Another P-A shopping happy ending!
Two weeks ago, I took my car to the shop to get new winter tires. I didn't know this until recently, but people around here put STUDS on their tires. They sounds like thousands of tiny metal horseshoes clip-clopping on the ground, and they keep a car from sliding all over an icy road. I am pretty sure they don't have THOSE in the city. At the end of my transaction, the lady working at the counter gave me a 2014 calendar with a car on the front. I open it up, and my innocent eyes could not BELIEVE what I saw! Inside the car calendar was a SECRET calendar. IT HAD NAKED MEN! 12 OF 'EM!!!! NAKED! I will bet you that no garage in the city will give the lady customers free pornographic material. NOW THAT'S A SHOPPING HAPPY ENDING!!!!
PS I hope there is a "Business of the Year" contest in P-A, I know who I am voting for!
