Welcome to my New Home!

I have moved back to my birthplace - a town of about 1800 in rural New Brunswick, Canada.

I have been gone for 20 years working in various cities, but not a lot has changed around here. People still leave their keys in their cars and their front doors unlocked...people still walk into your house without knocking and help themselves to a cup of coffee....and neighbors are both nosey AND some of the most helpful and wholesome folks you will ever find!

I am not sure if I will fit in here. I am used to "breakfast, lunch and dinner", not "breakfast, dinner and supper" which leads to all kinds of confusion when my friends show up at noon for a meal I was making at 6pm. I am also used to wearing $100 Lululemon yoga pants not $15 WalMart specials. (Not that there is anything wrong with WalMart!).

I have a convertible, which is completely inappropriate for a town that has snow 6 months of the year. I loved it when the old-timers would say, half-smiling, "So, you gonna be driving that car this winter?" like I might have just fell off the turnip truck the night before. I'd make my big blue eyes as big as I could as I would sweetly reply "Do you think I could....?"

Well, I WILL adjust, I WILL! One way or another, I want to be part of this town. I want to "be the me I was when I was child", not the one I created while living in the city.

So, let me share my experiences with you, as I adjust to this new, but old, environment.

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Weddings - RUN!!!!

I went to a wedding a few weeks ago,. My good friends Kathy and Terry got married in St. Andrews, NB. They have been together about 17-18 years (I have lost count!), which means, although Kathy is the one that started out as my friend, I now consider them both my friends after that many years.

So much so, that last fall when we needed some repairs done to our gigantic garage, that we offered the job to Terry, even though he and Kathy live above 3.5 hours away. Terry lived with us for the few weeks it took to get the job done.

Part of the family, really.

So, I usually like to contrast how things in the city are soooooooo much different than in the country. However, I now realize there is one thing that is exactly the same whether in the city or the country.

And that would be WEDDINGS. 

It is my fate in life to be in awkward wedding situations that I have no idea how to get myself out of.

I went to a wedding in a barn in St Catherines, Ontario where I got to chatting with a local "farmer" who I eventually realized was a weed farmer who tried to sell me said product outside the north side of the barn where the wedding took place.

I went to a wedding in Waterloo, Ontario, where the one of the ushers, who was also my boyfriend at the time, confessed he had been making out with one of the bridesmaids the previous night. I got back at him, though, although I didn't realize it until the next day. Apparently the 12-year old boy (I was 24 at the time) who kept asking me to dance that night had his hand on my ass all night. People were appalled at that, although I didn't notice at the time, probably because I had drowned my sorrows in multiple glasses of red wine.

Speaking of 12-year olds, Kathy and Terry's wedding that I went to might have scarred me for life. I love Kathy and Terry to death, but they had me seated at the reception next to a couple about my age who have young  children. Missy wanted to tell me her whole life story since the last time I saw her 25 years ago. The part that scarred me was when she told me she has a 12-year old son, ... and he is underdeveloped compared to others his age. No trauma, yet, right? She went on to tell her son's friend has been sexually active since he was 10, and she is pretty sure he own son can't even get a hard on. 

Ears bleeding. Ears bleeding. Ears bleeding. Ears bleeding.

The next wedding I get invited to, I am going to send an AMAZING present and pretend to have the plague. 


  1. Replies
    1. When Missy told me the story about her son, I just said "now that's disturbing". She didn't even skip a beat...just continued on and on and on .... (and on)....